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Well... here we are a few hours away from October and I've been quite absent from here! No excuses and well now that I'm no longer in school, perhaps I'll have more brain power to stop by more often.
Yes, that's right... no longer in school. I had to postpone the whole Radio thing due to finances and well to be honest - stress. I think anyone around me could deny how exhausted I was the past year - and it was to get even more insane with an internship on top of it all. We'll see what happens. I've already been able to incorporate learnings into my job and that's pretty darn cool.
So, nothing really new update wise... It's been a packed yet normal few months. Ooh, I did get to meet some adorable babies as a huge chunk of my friends seem to be spawning mini-people at the same time. Baby Marissa Kiley is super super cute! I gave her mom's arms a few hour break when I visited St. Louis in July. And then I finally got to meet baby Carlo Calbone this month. He's going to be a heart breaker! Next big event - Stephanie "Fishy" & Jason's wedding. Can you say about time?! I gave up counting a while ago but seriously I think they've been together for 14 years. Crazy! And apparently I get to meet baby Leah Zaat during that trip as well. I'm sure it will be jam packed.
But before that, I'm anxiously awaiting the Zombie Pub Crawl. I've been wanting to go for years and it seems this year I finally have some people to go with! Yay! There's also another theme party coming up and I'm thinking I'll have to decide if there will be another holiday party. Last year's ugly sweater party was borderline epic. Do we pick a new theme? Holiday formal wear? Holiday... Pageant wear? Anyhow, we'll see what comes to mind.
I'm trying to think of a good rant topic and seem to be blanking. I have had bunch of crappy drivers lately but that's so over done. So how about seeming random sticker! I was filling up at the gas station right next to the airport last Sunday. Literally as I'm standing starting the pump there a plane takes off and I practically go deaf. Then I look over at the pump and see this sticker...
AHAHAHAHAHA!!!! I think car stereos are the least of their problems.
Too funny. Anyhow, it's been fun but that's enough for now. Perhaps I will grace you with an entry before a 5 month lapse.
Cheers!
Franz
Wow, I can't believe it's May already. I seriously have no clue what happened to April. Oh yeah, I sneezed it away with allergies! Don't you loose brain cells when you sneeze? I remember there is something funny like that. I guess I could be thinking of your heart skipping a beat when you hiccup. Dammit, now I have to go look it up.
Anyhow, moving on. Today is my grandmother's 85th birthday. 85 years! I can't fathom it. The things she's seen, what she's lived through - it's amazing. I've always had the feeling that I wouldn't live that long or I'd die younger. My mom yells at me when she hears that. I don't know. I can't explain it. It's just a feeling. Who knows what will really happen. I've survived 30 years and so far so good. I'll just keep hanging on till it's my time.
So, I've calmed down a bit since my last post. I still just don't get people and their expectations. I'm focusing on me and trying to enjoy each day as it comes. The beautiful weather we've had the past few days is totally helping.
Today's thought is... Is there something that just tweaks you enough that it makes you want to do something about it, but you don't because then you're just silly? Like a pet peeve or whatever. For me it's misspellings of common words. I know I'm not a perfect speller; however when I see every day words completely butchered, it takes so much to keep me from screaming or correcting the person. Of course, I normally don't do either but I do cringe and just wonder how this can happen. Sometimes the people committing this horrible offense are have lived far long enough to know better. *sigh* Enough of that rant. Feel free to share your pet peeves!
Let's see, nothing much new here. I think I'm into week four of the new quarter at school. After this one is over, I get a three week break. Yay! I think I'll be heading down to the 'Lou for about a week around the end of June. It will be like a mini-vacation. So any of you crazy cats from down there want to do something let me know! If you're one of my friends who are popping out a kid around that time, I'd love to meet the little one!
Well, Monday's about over! That means the week can only get better right? I hope yours is fantabulous!
Cheers,
Franz
Have you ever had the feeling you just need to rant before your head explodes. Well today is one of those days for me. This is not meant to be a pity party. It's just me bitching about stuff - per usual. Like I said, I just have to get it out. So here it goes...
Why is being yourself never enough? I'm frankly sick of it. Whether it be for other people or for society, we're always expected to be more than who we are. By no means do I mean that we should settle for mediocrity or not try harder. I think, for some of us, that's all part of being who we are. Those of you who know me well, know I don't just settle. However, I'm also not throwing myself out there. I think there's a happy medium.
After some frustrations and revelations over the past little while, I'm just quite frankly fed up with it. Why can't I just be me? Why is that not good enough? The fact of the matter is - I can't be everything to everyone or even everything to anyone and I just don't get how people can expect that. Society, friends, relationships and people in general expect us to be what they need. Why should they expect me to be anything more or less than myself? Do I expect more out of them? No. And yes, I realize there's a chance that I'm one of the few people in the world who look at it that way. I'm really good for taking things for what they are - for not expecting life to hand over everything and dealing with what comes my way. Do I wish sometimes that it were a little bit easier and things to work they way I want it to? Sure. I'm only human but I do not expect it.
So now I'm left wondering how I ended up in such a position. Lately, I've really been feeling the whole I have to stop being so nice thing. Or do I just start thinking more about myself? I don't know, that wouldn't really be me now would it? I guess I'm just at a loss. I know I joke a bunch about the whole "If I don't quite feel like myself, then who do I feel like?" thing. But it's so true sometimes. I don't feel like myself and perhaps I don't want to feel like myself because myself is apparently just not good enough. Yeah sometimes I wish I could be a little more of this or that but overall I'm quite content with who I am. Maybe one day I'll find someone who can truly appreciate that but as for now, I'm not really sure that it exists in any shape or form. Somebody, whether it be a friend, a family member, a significant other, a boss, a coworker or whatever, always wants more.
Set an open course for the blogosphere
For I just gotta say
Say what's on my mind and what's happening
...
Okay enough of that. Although it may be amusing to actually parody the whole song. I guess I'm just not that bored nor do I have the time.
I really need to be more current with these updates, don't I? It's been a been a little crazy, but what else is new? This quarter at school just seemed busier. However, I managed to get a 4.0 again... So yay! Work is finally returning to somewhat normality. As you may recall there were two rounds of "layoffs" the past few months. The first was Voluntary. Some of my friends and great business partners took a voluntary separation option and then the rest of us held on to find out our fates in the involuntary version. Unfortunately, some good people were swept up in the involuntary mess, yet I once again manage to survive. Somehow... I'm actually looking forward to the new world. Since the layoffs were so wide spread and not just a few areas paring down, it's finally giving my team the opportunity to do what we've been talking about for years. So there finally appears to be light at the end of the proverbial tunnel.
So I guess that leaves the personal life. I'm back in the realm of the single and I'm totally good with it. It was my choice and I made the right one. Sometimes people just don't communicate the same way and it definitely an issue in that relationship. So here I am waiting for life to happen to me again and enjoying the ride.
It appears this app called LivingSocial is taking over Facebook these days. You rate your top 5 of random topics. I filled out the Top 5 Albums that shaped my life. I had a hard time with this because of the whole album thing. (You may recall a previous entry around songs for Life's Soundtrack.) I noticed some other people filling theirs out and a lot of their music seemed from the same time period. Not like there is anything wrong with that, especially for the younger crowd. I just looked at my life and there's just been so many aspects and phases that I reached for something for a variety. So here it is in no particular order:
1. Metallica - Metallica
2. Paul's Boutique - Beastie Boys
3. Ten - Pearl Jam
4. Les Miserables - The Original Broadway Cast
5. Avenged Sevenfold - Avenged Sevenfold
Paul's Boutique started it all. It was my first foray into "real" music. I was 10, living in NY and listening to stuff like NKOTB, Tiffany, the Bangles and Weird Al. Then, my brother's friend Jon introduced us to the Beastie Boys. I heard songs like Egg Man, The Sounds of Science and Looking down the Barrel of a Gun and I was hooked. The sound was so different and riveting compared to the mall pop and "crap" I normally listed to. Now, I still have a rather eclectic taste in music but it was Paul's Boutique that probably what saved me from being a mindless pop drone.
I don't even think I need to explain Ten. One of few albums I recall loving every moment of. Black, Even Flow and Once... Amazing.
Thanks to my brother for exposing me to Metallica. As much I loved the grunge and alternative stuff at the time, Metallica introduced me to the harder side of things and of course, more Metallica. Thus leading me to one of my favorite songs of all time - One.
Les Miserables definitely speaks to that eclectic musical taste point. I am continually moved by this story and the music created to tell it. I can see a bit of myself in each character and their struggle.
Avenged Sevenfold came to me at a very pivotal time in my life. The entire album was created in a very groove oriented style which just makes you want to move with the whole thing. My favorite songs off the album are Afterlife, Lost and A Little Piece of Heaven, but it's another one of those albums I can listen to the entire thing and it never gets old.
Anyhow, so I guess that's a discussion prompter... What is one or a few albums that shaped you?
That's all I got for now.
Cheers,
Franz
Where to begin? I really can't believe it's been almost two months since I last posted anything. I did the whole "Hey, I'm going to blog tonight" thing a few times over the holidays and that obviously didn't happen. Oh well.
Let's see... 2008 was an interesting year - a roller coaster to say the least. It started off rough as I attempted to find out what was wrong with baby Otto and continued the struggle to sell the house. Work left me stressed and rather lost, but my personal life was going pretty well.
Late Spring and Summer brought on more ups and downs. The house finally sold and I got situated in my new "pretty much completely done with the ex" life. I preformed my friend's wedding ceremony and that was a truly unique and uplifting experience. On the other side, parts of my personal life that were going well seemed to dwindle and unfortunately Otto's health drastically turned for the worse and I had to put him to sleep. Sometimes I feel like such a dork for how much that affected me. I still cry when I remember baby Otto, all he did for me and what it was like watching him waste away and hopefully not suffer.
Late Summer through the end of the year brought many changes and things I'd like to think are positive. I adopted a new kitty to keep Rufus company. His name is Stuart and he can be a bit of a pain but so adorable at the same time. I figured it was time to start actively dating again since whatever was going on with the one guy wasn't really going anywhere. I met a couple of really nice guys, but determined I didn't have time for a relationship because... I decided to go back to school for Radio Broadcasting - what I always wanted to do. I'm so very glad I did because I haven't felt this right in quite some time. I was somewhat taken by surprise in November when a guy I met through friends asked me out on a date. I can't even remember the last time a guy just asked me out like that. I know it only makes sense due to the roughly 7 years with the ex and then when I attempted to date I did the online thing. Anyhow, the date was great and 2 months later we're still going out. Probably one of the more momentous occasions of the year happened in late December. I turned 30.
Wow, what a year. So here we are in 2009. A monumental year thus far as today we celebrated the inauguration of President Barack Obama. No matter your race, religion or political affiliation, you have to take pride in how far we've come as a nation and that you can say you "were there" - no matter where you were - when the first African American president was sworn into office. I was personally filled with hope, pride and a little bit of excitement for what lies ahead. Of course it won't be instant and it will take a while for the new administration to find the path and make change, but we can only go up from here.
Okay enough of that for now. I'm interested to see what else 2009 has in store for me. It's started out fairly stressful as my struggle to understand certain aspects of life continues and I attempt to figure out how to juggle work, school and my personal life. I want to thank those of you who have been so supportive over the past year. Surely it would have been much harder without you. Here's to a new year, new challenges and hopefully happier, less stressful days for not only me but for you and your families.
Cheers,
Franz
Note: I was going to rant a bit about winter and perhaps some other stuff, but figured I rambled enough for now. It seemed a little off topic from the rest of this post, but it also means I may have to post another rant sooner rather than later.
